#MaybeI'mTheOneWho'sDrunk #WhatDidIDoLastNight
What...is this?
5 hours ago
“I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.” —Oscar Wilde
The Ranch on Netflix is Terrible
Nine minutes and 47 seconds I'll never get back. With this cast, The Ranch had a decent shot at making something new. You've got Sam Elliot and Debra Winger, and it felt right to make it feel like a re-cooked send-up of That 70s Show? Really? Then you don't understand that show was corny and cartoonish for a reason, and it worked. But The Ranch tries an approach that's literally as though Kelso and Hyde reunited, on a ranch...in…
1313 Days Left
"This is a man who was coddled and spoiled as a child. Then, as an adult, he surrounded himself with people who fed his ego and told him how amazing he was at everything he did. This created a person whose view on the world is so completely warped that he lacks the ability to understand that he’s not a very bright person. But he’s so incredibly ignorant that he truly believes he 'comprehends better than almost anybody,' that he has…
The Art of Telling a Joke
Recently I was asked to punch up a job post for a high tech company. The
CEO said he was trying to entice quality applicants, but he'd been
informed that the tone of his job post made a fun workplace sound like a
total drag. It did. We fixed it, and we did it with humor. Does Humor Belong In Business Writing?
There's a ton of
advice online sternly advising against using any humor at all, ever, in
business writing, whether it's a…
Losing Our Heroes: Adam West, 1928 - 2017
Adam West was my Batman. His was the Batman that I knew first, so he's the one whose visage my mind's eye still summons whenever I hear someone say "Batman." In those days, Batman as a franchise was campy. It was a comic book lifted right from the cartoon pages and performed by people doing very silly things in a very serious manner. Decades before the franchise turned dark, Batman was good wholesome family fun. Just like Roger…
"HEY, NOVEMBER RAIN !"
This one time, Joe and I were on a road trip and we stopped at a dumpy little town diner. We walked in the door and heard, from somewhere in the place, "HEY, NOVEMBER RAIN!" Probably there's still some locals in a small Vermont town that tell about the time they saw Axl Rose havin' a Western Omelette.
I Don't Often Go To Big Stadium Rock Shows
But When I Do, There Is No Line At The Ladies' Room. All men, and me. Every time.
It's been about Trump THE WHOLE TIME.
"First Democrats complain about Comey needing to go, and now he's gone and they're still complaining." What.
Are these people serious with this asinine spin? Does this utter nonsense actually work on some people? As though the American people are overtired toddlers that cry when they get what they want, because they don't know what they want in the first place. No, Democrats aren't "just complaining" about wh…
What Is Content?
In
the business world there's a nugget of wisdom that suggests we should
be able to explain our work "to our grandparents." Now, I know many
brilliant individuals with grandchildren who do not need things
dumbed-down, so phrased in a less insulting way, let's say you're
doing well if you can explain your work to anyone who isn't in your same
exact business. The layperson, if you will.
So, for the non-marketer, wh…
Cheap Chic: Neither/Nor
This is Why I Hate The #@$%#*@ Phone
______________
So tell me if you think this is weird.
On Tuesday (4/18/2017) I called Cheap Chic. "Hello!" I said to the woman who picked up. "My name is Michelle, I'm a local, I come to Cheap Chic all the time. The reason I'm calling is to ask if you guys could maybe bring your box of vinyl out from behind those shelves? Since Saturday is Record Store Day, I'm planning to walk ar…
#Isn'tSpringFreshAlreadyADouche
These kicks look like they'll summon the ghost of Mel Torme to sing to me on a dais. # HeLikesWhatIDo # TheseAreJimmysTrainingShoes # 1990sTVReferences # JimmyCouldntJumpAtAllBefore # TheyrePlyometric
47 Trips Around the Sun: Five Things I'm Sure About
It's my 47th birthday. As a Gen Xer with almost half a century of experience, I've come to some conclusions. Here are five things I'm pretty sure about. 1.Guitar Comedy
Hey Demitri, Birbigs, that guy, and that other guy. You know who you are. So, I've given it literally dozens of chances, but I'm afraid it's a no from me, dawg. I love you, but when you reach for that guitar, my brain goes, "Noooooooo!" You're…
47 Trips Around the Sun: An Observed Life
Two Aprils ago, on my 45th birthday, I penned a semi-serious list of 45 Things I Know as a way to commemorate the occasion. People seemed to like it. I suspect the reason why that particular essay was met with such unilateral applause is that most of my friends assumed I'd be dead by now. * The thing about writers is that we live an observed life. I have whole scenes in my head, as do most writers I presume, that vividly recall events both maj…
If You're Not Following Cher, You're Twittering Wrong
I love Cher. I love that sonorous voice. I love her brass balls attitude. I love her in every movie she's ever been in, especially The Witches of Eastwick. I love Cher so much that I even love total strangers who also love Cher. Whether or not you're a fan of this perpetually raven-haired Gen X icon, you're missing out if you're not following Cher on Twitter. The key to Cher's Twitter brilliance? Chick's got some serious…
