Home Depot Thrilled!
4 hours ago
“I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.” —Oscar Wilde
Married Filing Jointly
Thanks to a Vegas chapel and H&R Block , Joe and I have new pet names, or insults, depending on circumstance and inflection.
If It Ain't One Thing It's Your Mother
Today is my mom's birthday! I called her first thing this morning to wish her a happy day. Because it's a Saturday, Louie doesn't have to work, so she has the whole day planned. But first, out to breakfast, so she had to get off the phone. We set a time to talk next week. When we do I'll ask how today's plan turned out. There is always a story.
Key Change
There should be a name for the phenom where, every couple of years, you marvel at how many mystery keys you carry around.
Where do all these mystery keys come from?
You toss old, obsolete keys every Key Purge.
You toss the laundry room key from two apartments ago.
You toss the key to a freight elevator located in a building that's been demolished.
You toss what might be a key to a gym locker, or it might be for the mailbox from the buildi…
THE PICKLE: Volume 1, Issue 3
The first fifty days of the new administration have ushered in an emotionally supercharged period in modern America. People in red states and blue states are in states of confusion, state experts state.
"This is a highly unusual situation," says Dr. Harry Chopin Savage. Savage is an industry leader in applied data science. Dr. Savage is the author of "Big Data and Urban Civilization," currently touring colleges and universit…
Two Dorks at Home
Joe just finished explaining his place in his dorky history video game. Apparently the
King of Siam is threatening his borders. I said, "Maybe he's just
(breaking into song) getting to knooooow you, getting to know alllll
about youuuuu..."
...pause...
"Get it?"
"No, none of that made sense to me. Is it a joke?"
"Well in the musical 'The King and I' he's the King of Siam, and that's t…
The Revolution Will Be Digitized (Because F**k This Guy)
Every generation needs to find a way to come to terms with its dark years. Slavery, Chinese encampment, Japanese persecution. Here is what people have been asking themselves throughout the recorded history of humans: "If I were alive during [mass persecution of any one group] and saw what was happening, what would I have done?" Three weeks into the Trump administration, you no longer have to wonder what you would have done. What you ar…
Boston Women's March 2017 (Later That Night)
What I found coolest about today was the respect and solidarity. I walked with a river of women, with everyone who came along because they understand what I've been saying for years: feminism is for everyone. Signs declared truth, everything from "Black Lives Matter" to "If You Cut Off My Reproductive Choice, Can I Cut Off Yours?" The gay guys, always THE BEST, came out with "Born This Way" and "You Can…
FB Questionnaire: Top 10 Records of My Teens
This latest Facebook questionnaire asks you to name the top ten records of your teen years. This one sparked more than a few, shall we say, enthusiastic discussions among my social network. There were some near-Unfriending incidents. Granted, mine is a particularly musically-charged gang of misfits. Dear friends absolutely demolish each other over hot button issues such as whether or not Billy Squire got robbed. (Update: Don't @ me.)
FB Questionnaire: Holiday Games
1. What was the last thing you put in your mouth?
I am glad that I saw this after breakfast and not right when I woke up. Because a tangerine, then...
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