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Wednesday, November 28, 2018
Sunday, November 25, 2018
You Can "Take" Classes Online With Me If You Want To
I write a lot about the pure drivel that stood for "education" in the 1970s. That's because the rest of my life has been preoccupied with un-learning all of that baloney. Last month, over a reunion weekend that we try to do every-so-often, I consulted with my three girlfriends (great loves of my life!). These are the lifelong friends, and Michelle, Colleen and Simone were there with me from Grades 1 through 8 when we were at the mercy of some old nuns for showing us how the world works. But here's the thing...the old nuns didn't actually know how any of it works. And they didn't like questions. So they didn't like me. They gave us this Bible
as big as our History book, and both books contained names and stories and
dates, and it was all presented in the same way, more or less. So George Washington and Jesus and
Santa all figured into the narrative about the same, more or less. They sent us off to high school with a right proper disaster of a world view. High school and college had a big job to do, which is UN-learn us and try to point us in the right direction. Every time I think about it, I'm staggered anew by the gall. It is so galling.
Of late, I've been availing myself of the great universities who've kindly posted full semesters on YouTube, with particular interest in history and literature. Right now I'm "taking" two classes, should any of you find yourselves seeking something better to do than poke around Facebook. At Harvard, Dr. Marjorie Garber knows a lot about every Shakespeare play, and at Columbia, Richard Bulliet knows a lot about how come my early education was such a load of crap.
Course: Harvard, ENGL E-129
Shakespeare After All: The Later Plays
Course: Columbia, W3902
World History to 1500 CE
Saturday, November 24, 2018
This is The House That Carpenter Built
Feb 2018 "We wanted something in the vein of the classic films we loved growing up," Ross shared with IGN. "Obviously the influences are all over the show, whether it’s Spielberg’s stuff or John Carpenter or the novels of Stephen King. And I think for us looking at it, it’s like, 'What is it about these stories that resonated so much with us when we were growing up?' And I think really what it is, what connects all of them even though tonally sometimes they’re different -- but what really connects them is that these very ordinary people encountering these very extraordinary things. So I think those were the initial conversations, of can we get back to that style of storytelling?"
Put super-simply: these stories persist because there's so much to speculate about, including whether or not The Thing ends with MacReady and Childs transmogriformulated into Thing 1 and Thing 2, and "it" is about to go back to sleep again until the rescue team arrives, at which point "it" can get a lift to a great food source: civilization. So I like to think of MacReady and Childs as a manifestation of the Thing finally getting it right, having perfected a viable human replication, after failing (but learning!) with all those dogs and men...and obviously some spiders. It likes spiders.
Something about 1983
In The Thing, it is 1983 in Antarctica. In Stranger Things, it is 1983 in Hawkins, Indiana. In common, there's a creature from another world that's been dormant deep below in a frozen realm. Now the creature has been awoken by the unfortunate antics carried out by a squad of researchers, and the deadly genie is out of its proverbial bottle. Also in common, this strange thing seeks to survive and to spread all across the planet, maybe all across the universe! The creature requires living hosts. It is impervious to everything except fire.
Creature Double-Feature?
Let's talk about the nature of the beast in both stories. This is the fun part. The creature requires a host in order to replicate, right? It is suggested that it would remain dormant for millennia until it finds a suitable environment. For most of the story, whatever screeching, writhing monstrosity manages to survive the replication looks like a wet pile of Starship crew after a transporter malfunction. As the movie progresses, the Thing gets better at attack, absorption and imitation, but first it tears mightily through all the Norwegians, their dogs, then all the American dogs and humans until the only surviving life-forms are MacReady and Childs. In Stranger Things, Eleven tells the other kids that it's her fault that the creature was
awoken, insisting that she is reason that it has the ability to materialize from its icy realm in the dark depths she calls the Upside Down. Well how come that is? How does El know it is her fault? Well, how indeed, dear reader! And here is the apotheosis of my would-be cross-over fan fictionalizing...I love doing this stuff. And I love these Duffer Brothers.
The ancient alien is a Darwinian nightmare, defying everything we know about zoology, paleontology, genetics and developmental biology. The thing is a miracle of evolution, or one could argue, an abomination of natural selection. Like an undersea life-form, the thing thrives in dark, cold and hostile environments. Its core structure is kind of like a fleshy kelp tree, and it is strong. It throws thick, sinewy tendrils that can penetrate and grind up its hapless victims. It can also reproduce through spore production, propagating like a fungus by absorbing all carbon-based life-forms and appropriating whatever materials it needs to better adapt, survive and spread. What it does not use, it discards in favor of traits better-suited for adaptation. Not only can it absorb materials, but it can also imitate. So it can mimic blood, gristle, bones, teeth, even hair. The thing is capable of replicating the useful attributes of whatever life-form it consumes, be it insect, reptile, beast or man. As it replicates, it adapts. It learns. It mutates. If is is capable of replicating, adapting and mutating, then imagine what would transpire should such a creature take on telekinesis, clairvoyance, and the ability to travel back and forth between the physical world and a cold, dark psychic realm? The alien has adapted beyond the physical. It was never a thing of nature, not as mankind understands nature. But now it's a thing of super-nature. It is a much stranger thing. What a great place to restart the story.That's my theory, and I'm stickin' to it! You go, Duffer Brothers. Well done. 🔥
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| It loves spiders. |
Thursday, November 22, 2018
In a column dated November 17, 1928
“I had been fed, in my youth, a lot of old wives' tales about the way
men would instantly forsake a beautiful woman to flock around a
brilliant one. It is but fair to say that, after getting out in the
world, I had never seen this happen."
—Dorothy Parker
—Dorothy Parker
Wednesday, November 21, 2018
Global Warning
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| "I'm one of those people who doesn't believe in global warming, but I'm pretty sure Noah's Ark was a true story. You know, where the guy was warning everyone about the insane change in the weather and everyone was like, shut the fuck up, Noah." - Rory Scovel |
Allston Christmas (*actual)
*Note. This post was about actual Allston Christmas. Not Allston Xmas, what Rock City's genial citizenry calls late August/early September. That is a neighborhood-specific season, short but chaotic, as the Sun gets less intense about his work, and single flip-flops begin to materialize in the streets, discarded during some end-of-school-year walk-of-shame just before the students all clear out of Rock City for another year. Year-round residents navigate chock-a-block Uhauls and Riders and out-of-state SUVs piloted by bewildered parents. At all hours the members of this honking horde finally find the Mass Pike entrance and get the hell outta here, and they leave behind their security deposits along with towering piles of books, kitchen appliances, musical instruments, furniture, toys, clothes and whatnot, through which the locals go "picking" or "junking" for what treasure they may seek. I'm pretty good at it. Mark your calendar.
Tuesday, November 20, 2018
Sunday, November 18, 2018
Thursday, November 15, 2018
#ThrowbackThursday (Blogcast: April 10, 2018)
Here is one of my "Blogcast" posts from earlier in the year. Regular followers will know that I made an attempt to convert my blog to an audio-only format...no edits! But it didn't work. Because that was a truly terrible idea. And I am sure I'll try it again anyway, because I never learn, do I? This Blogcast, titled "We Got The President We Deserve," is about how digital marketers have been utilizing the data we all put online, that it was never a secret, how all of you opted into participating, and I give some examples in the retail world, and then I show how the same principles apply to CAMPAIGN MARKETING, which in the case of Election 2016 included Russian manipulation of public sentiment against Clinton. Because of the "no edit" rule I foolishly made, I ramble. I'm way better in printed material, guys.
I recorded this Blogcast while Mark Zuckerberg was testifying before Congress on April 10th, right after I heard some old fart politician ask Zuck a question and pronounce "content" as "conTENT," proving once again that these old farts have zero idea what they're even talking about because they're analog thinkers in a digital world, y'all.
They don't get it. They gotta go, man.
Listen as SuperLowBudge explains how some of this shit works.
If
you don't know what you're doing, just get offline and go do something
else.
Otherwise, you in danger, y'all.
They don't get it. They gotta go, man.
Wednesday, November 14, 2018
President Trump accuses people
Sunday, November 11, 2018
Thank you for your service, and your sacrifice
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| I wrote to a guy who has done a ton of research and he wrote me back! He said "The 14th AIB was part of the 1st AD." |
Friday, November 9, 2018
Spell check always wants to change my last name to "dipole."
Thursday, November 8, 2018
#ThrowbackThursday Election Day 2012
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Today's #Throwback is a photo snapped by Joe at our polling place, as he does. I think I have a photo of myself at most polls for the past 16 years since I got myself a Joe.
Speaking of 2012, is anyone else wondering just how strange it will be
to see Mitt Romney as a Senator now? I actually think he'll do okay as
soon as he uploads the Senator program into his central processing unit. Fucking Mitt Romney, am I right? ð›±
