A Compendium of Good Advice

My birthday post last week (45 Things I Know) reminded me of something cool. Last September I hosted a one-day group project on Facebook in which I invited my friends to participate in compiling A Compendium of Good Advice. Something like a Gen X edition of The Desiderata. It came out pretty good. People should listen to us. We've seen some shit.

Control your mouth. We live in a society here.

Before you gossip, think. Think of the harm. Good rule: if you wouldn't say it within earshot of a child, don't say it at all.

Be considerate. Look behind you at the cash register, and if the next customer only has one item compared to your full basket, invite them to go ahead. 

Don't stink! Use deodorant, especially in summer, and most especially if you take public transportation please and thank you.

Floss. Regularly.

Pause more. If someone snaps at you or acts rude, take a deep breath and let it go. Think of their act as a spark, and you have the power to either douse it with kind understanding, or pour gasoline on it by responding to rudeness in kind.

Own it. Own all your shit, whether you are the water or the fire.

Don't interrupt. 

Be pleasant to waiters and waitresses. All of them, always. Tip generously.

Unclench. 

Hold the doors for others (literal, and figurative, and spiritual, etc...)

Look around and appreciate art everywhere, not only in museums...curate your own world of art right where you are...

If you see someone with food in their teeth, a zipper flying low, or their slip showing, take them aside and tell them, stranger or not. 

Always say please, and thank you. 

Always be polite and appreciative. 

Learn how to sincerely apologize. 

Talk to kids with respect and dignity. It'll teach them they're worthy of both, and carry that forward. 

Say hello to your neighbors. If you're too shy, at least smile and wave or nod.

Be the honey, not the vinegar. 

Take time to consider your options. Play out worst consequence and then go for it.

Make a conscious decision every day about the kind of person you want to be. 

Listen to the truth that is inside you and do what is right, regardless of how others act, regardless of your own past mistakes or regrets. 

Make eye contact. Everyone is worth that, and it is the least you can do. 

Lighten the soul. Letting go is liberating, and with time you will learn what to keep and what to discard.

Take responsibility for your trash/waste. Recycle the literal, get therapy for the figurative.

We do not inherit the earth from our ancestors. We borrow it from our children. 

Engender empathy. 

Be yourself.